As I have already mentioned, the Sus Inima Association functions because there are a number of people dedicated body and soul to the mission, who have stories worth hearing.

Today we tell the story of Filofteia Cojocaru, or as people call her, Aunt Tina.

Aunt Tina is a soul with a special light. Her presence is gentle and warm, which makes you want to bring out the best in yourself, because you want to mirror the gentleness with which she relates to the world. She’s like a mother, a mother of us all. She’s humble and you feel how much she cares. Maybe a little too much, sometimes, because it costs her the story of every person who steps inside SUS INIMA houses. And you can’t fake that. She is the heart of SUS INIMA houses in Sibiu. A woman of incredible strength, because only a strong person can be as strong as she is.

She arrived in Sibiu in 2017, coming from a commune in Vâlcea county. She worked for 10 years at the town hall as a social worker. In 2007, her husband was diagnosed with leukemia. Five difficult years followed, with dialysis, cytostatics, his condition getting worse and worse, until 2012, when he passed away. That period was a constant back and forth between hospital and home. Tina said she often wished it was her instead of him, but he said he couldn’t take care of her the way she took care of him. She remained in Valcea for another five years after her husband died.

Tina has two children who live in Sibiu. A girl and a boy. The boy married a year after his father’s death and has two daughters, one is 7 years old and the other is 3. The daughter also married recently and has an 8-month-old daughter, whom Tina adores.

After the wedding, Tina’s son opened his own business and could not afford to visit her much. Being away from her children and grandchildren, Tina sold everything and moved to Sibiu. Her first job was at a handbag company. That job affected her health because of the toxicity of the substances they used to treat the handbags, so she quit. She started looking for a new job but nothing came up. And that’s because her place was at SUS INIMA, not elsewhere.

Her son had known Carmen Chindris for a long time. He participated with one of her daughters in the Sibiu International Marathon in 2018, running for SUS INIMA. Carmen decided that in 2019, with the money raised at the marathon, she would rent a space and start the association’s activity. But to get started, she needed to hire a social worker. Learning that Aunt Tina worked in the field, Carmen offered her the job. Tina wasn’t convinced at first, she needed time to think about it.

Tina’s road was a challenging one and her life wasn’t always serene. However, Tina has found her balance. She is now doing very well and her children bring her a lot of joy and give her strength to move forward. In addition to the children, another place where Tina finds strength, motivation and drive to move forward is the collective at SUS INIMA. But even here it wasn’t easy for her from the start.

When she started the houses activity, one of the first cases was a 32-year-old girl. This girl’s story had a major impact on Tina. She was older than her daughter by a day, and had two children. She had lung surgery, then the cancer recurred in her brain, followed by two more brain operations. She kept coming for check-ups in Sibiu, and for sessions with the psychologist. Tina kept in touch with her on whatsapp and facebook, but the girl died last year. Tina admits she was affected and needed some time to rebalance.

Tina’s role is to greet people, the sick ones, who usually can’t afford to commute or stay in a hostel or hotel. They come from Valcea, Alba, Hunedoara and the towns around Sibiu. The fact that they have a place to stay makes them very happy. Tina says they can’t believe it’s possible, that there are people who think of them. One lady said that “only God brought you in my way, otherwise I would be sleeping in the station. During the day I planned to stay in the park and at night go to sleep at the station, because I couldn’t afford to commute.”

When they arrive, patients are scared, disbelieving, disoriented. They ask Tina if they’ll last the therapy sessions. Some have as many as 38 sessions.

Tina is always there for them, supporting and encouraging them. She listens to every story and gets attached to everyone. She told us that during their stay in the SUS INIMA homes, the patients become friends, they laugh and joke, and there’s a great atmosphere. She has never been intrusive with questions and curiosities about their private lives, she listens as much as they tell. And they get to tell their whole lives. They share both their personal stories and the journey of their illness, how they found out that they have cancer and everything they’ve experienced about their treatment so far. Tina is strong and patient, she listens to them, urges them to be positive and optimistic and to want to get better so they can beat the disease.

Another case Tina spoke about was of a young boy whose health had always been fragile. He suffered from a number of illnesses and had several heart operations. This boy said that each time he felt that he would get better and that this time he felt the same.

Tina has so many stories to tell because people trust and open up to her. The fact that she also lost a loved one to cancer makes people feel understood and allows them to be vulnerable. They feel that she also knows what the illness and suffering they are going through means. These people are like family to her, and when they leave home at the end of treatment, it leaves a hole in her heart. Tina says that for her it’s like them leaving her home, because SUS INIMA is like a second home.

People want to be heard, to feel that everyone matters in some way. And Tina gives this gift to everyone who crosses the doorstep of SUS INIMA houses. She listens to everyone, patiently and compassionately, and that matters. It certainly helps the healing process. Because, at its core,what Tina shares through her way of relating to people is love, and there is no person in the world who does not want to be loved.